Earlier this week, I went to the chiropractor for the very first time. After years of falling off horses and walking like an old lady, I decided it was finally time to do something about my very grumpy back. I had put off going because I knew that my back was really messed up, and I didn’t want to be living in the chiropractor’s office for the next month. I let my back get to the point where it was either go get help or live your life in pain, and I’m over living in pain, so I went. How often do we put off our own healing because we’re scared of the work we’re going to have to do?
Stepping out onto the path that leads to wholeness and restoration is a daunting task. Walking into the unknown always is. No one wants to break the seals and open the boxes of their past, coming face to face with the hardest parts of their story. Yet, we cannot expect ourselves to go through life pain-free if we have not given ourselves time to process and heal from past hurts. Even after we’ve healed it, we will always have the scars of our past on our bodies and hearts. They’ll ache and groan when the weather changes, giving us little reminders of those parts of our stories that made us who we are today. But the pain won’t be fresh; it won’t be hot and searing, consuming our minds with thoughts of it. When we don’t properly heal, those wounds will fester and poison our hearts, minds, and lives. Causing us more pain than they did initially.
While the chiropractor was adjusting my upper back, he said something that stuck with me. He said my vertebras wanted to go back home; they just needed a push. I feel like that’s as true for life as it is for bones. We all have a longing to go back home, to feel that sense of security to be ourselves and the comfort that comes from being around love, joy, and hope regularly. But sometimes, that journey to home and healing is longer than we thought and filled with more trials and tribulations than anticipated. Often we need other people to come alongside us and give us a gentle nudge in the right direction…or a full-on push to get us going.
You don’t have to go on this journey alone. You don’t have to brave the darkness of uncertainty by yourself. We’re braver together. There are people in our lives who would love to walk into the unknown alongside us. The scariest step is always the first one, and in this case, that might be asking a friend for help. Don’t let the fear of vulnerability stop you from seeking healing and hope.
I lived for almost a decade with a back that hurt more often than it didn’t because I feared the work that I would have to put in to help my body feel better. It’s easier to live in the pain that we already know, but it sure isn’t more comfortable. Our hearts long to come home, to find healing, joy, love, and hope. But the journey is long, and there are many roadblocks along the way, so boldly take that first step and grab your travelling companions. Don’t wait a decade to find freedom; you deserve better than that. We are called to live wild and free, so let’s chase after it.